Friday, October 1, 2021

No Longer Human : Osamu Dazai full text

I don’t directly know the madman who wrote this memoir. However, I do know the person who appears in the journal, who may be the madam of the kyobashi stand-bar. She was small, pale, with narrow, upturned eyes and a high nose, and looked more like a beautiful young man than a beautiful woman. It seems that this memoir mainly describes the scenery of Tokyo in those days of 1930s, 1960s and 1970s, but it was around the 10th year of the Showa era, when the “military” of Japan was beginning to be exposed explicitly, that my friend took me to the stand bar of kyobashi a couple of times to drink highballs. It was around the 10th year of the Showa era, when the Japanese “military” was beginning to be exposed, so I was unable to meet the man who wrote this memoir.
 However, in February of this year, I visited a friend who had evacuated to Funabashi City in Chiba Prefecture. In fact, I had asked my friend to arrange a marriage for one of my relatives, so I thought I would buy some fresh seafood for my family to eat. I went to Funabashi City with a backpack on my back.
 Funabashi City was a rather large city facing the muddy sea. It was not easy to find the house of my friend, a new resident, even if I asked the locals for the address. It was cold and my shoulders ached from carrying my backpack, so I pushed open the door of a coffee shop, attracted by the sound of a record on a harp.
 I felt familiar with the madam there, and when I asked her, I found out that she was the little old lady from kyobashi ten years ago. She seemed to remember me right away, and we both exaggeratedly surprised and laughed. Then, as usual in such situations, we talked about our experiences of being burned out in air raids, as if we were proud of each other, even though we were not asked.
“You, however, have not changed.
“No, I’m an old woman. No, I’m an old woman now, my body is in shape. No, I’m an old woman.
“No, I have three more children. I’m going shopping for them today.
 We exchanged the usual greetings of people who have not seen each other for a long time, and then we asked each other what had happened to our mutual acquaintances. Then, suddenly, Madame changed her tone and asked me if I knew Ip-chan. When I replied that I didn’t know her, she went to the back of the room, brought me three notebooks and a picture of Mitsuba, and handed them to me.
“She handed me three notebooks and a photo of Miho.
 He said.
 I’m not one to write with material forced upon me by others, so I was about to give them back immediately, but I was so fascinated by the photo (I’ve already written about the strangeness of the photo of the three leaves on the postcard) that I decided to leave the notebooks with him anyway. I asked her if she knew where the professor of the women’s college lived, and she said she did. She said she sometimes came to this coffee shop. It was just around the corner.
 That night, after sharing a few drinks with my friend, we decided to have him stay with us, and I stayed up all night reading Rei’s notebook.
 I stayed up all night and read through Rei’s notebooks. The stories in the journal were from the past, but I’m sure they would be of great interest to people today. It seemed to me that it would be more meaningful to ask some magazine to publish the story rather than adding my own handwriting to it.
 The only marine products I brought back for the children were dried fish. I left my friend’s place with my backpack on my back, stopped by a coffee shop and said
I stopped by Rei’s coffee shop and said, “Thanks for your help last night. By the way, ……”.
 I immediately started with
“I was wondering if I could borrow this notebook for a while.
“Yes, please.
“Is this man still alive?
“Well, that’s the thing, I have no idea. About ten years ago, a parcel containing the notebook and photos was sent to the kyobashi store, and the sender was supposed to be Ip-chan, but there was no address or even name on the parcel. During the air raid, it was lost among other things, and I was strangely saved by it.
“Did you cry?
“No, not crying. …… No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
“It’s been ten years since then, so he’s probably dead by now. I’m sure he sent this to you as a thank you. It may have been an exaggeration, but it seems that you have suffered a great deal of damage. If all of this were true, and if I were his friend, I would have wanted to take him to a brain hospital.
“It’s her father’s fault, you know.
 He said casually.
“The Ip-chan we knew was a very honest, good-natured girl, who, if she hadn’t been drinking, would have been a …… god-like good girl.